Sunday, November 20, 2016


My sister whose temporal but not spiritual husband passed in July gave the above to her daughters today.  He always played Santa on Christmas eve.We follow the Nicaraguan tradition of a big meal and family event on Christmas eve.  Unfortunately we are now way too big to have just one event, so for the third year there will be two separate events, at different homes.  

I will be with my sister for many reasons.  But her grand kids are already stoked that Santa's Elf will replace Santa.  They know their grandfather always played Santa, but I cannot replace Santa.  This is in part why I chose Elf for Halloween.

I am told the kids are all excited.  In fact a niece sent me a FB message to remind me to pack it because her kids are expecting me as Elf.  The holiday season is around the corner.  What ever your faith or non faith, use the day to be with family and have fun.  We will have lots of fun.  I feel sorry for people who cannot make believe and just have fun.

Now to be honest when I walk in with the Elf sack for the kids, I expect it to get emotional since it is not my sister's late temporal husband.  But the moment will pass. My sister and I will work as a team to make the transition work.

Oh, why late temporal husband - because that is all she lost.  She will tell you he is with her every day.  She said the other day when she was sad because she could not find something for her daughters' for Christmas which hold locks of their father's hair, she got a magazine with a page bend.  She went to the page and there it was.

In my family we believe the spiritual being is always there and all you have to do is open your eyes. My sister will say not a day goes by where he is not there.  You have to believe and open your eyes.

A side story, I got to NY on the 4th of July.  I was packing late on the 3rd when I got the email that our sister Dorothy had passed.  I already knew earlier in the evening they had pulled life support.  She was ready.  She was 82 or 83 and several years in a nursing home with real bad dementia and Alzheimer and bedridden.  I decided to not tell anyone because I did not want to take away from my NY sister's grief.  Well she held services for her husband until the 5th to allow family to arrive from all over the U.S.  As he was passing in hospice care he made her promise to still do the annual 4th of July party at their eldest daughter's home.  

Well out of the blue my sister got really aggressive about asking about Dorothy.  I kept on avoiding her questions.  I finally gave in and told her Dorothy died the night before at 5 to midnight.  She smiled.  I asked why she was smiling and she said she knew her spiritual husband was in her head just telling her he and Dorothy were safe and happy.  I wish everyone could understand this, but I respect our differences.  Anyway I am stoked for Christmas, I get in Christmas eve about 4 hours before the festivities begin.  I will not replace Santa because I cannot, but Elf will be a new tradition.

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